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- - 1 - -
 

In the spring of 1867, a trapper stumbled into a rather unremarkable clearing in northwestern Montana. Haggard, delirious and almost dead from pneumonia, he didn't notice the ground starting to vibrate... or the hole appear in front of his feet.

Under the meadow, his needs were tended to, and unimagined comforts offered as well. He would have been sent on his way, but the syphilis was well-advanced. As it turned out, he never saw the sky again. For the next three months he was fed and pampered - until the time he didn't wake up.

His patterns were studied and extrapolated for years.
Then the system went into standby mode, until the next opportunity...
 

 
- - 2 - -
 

"Tim!"
"Quiet. Asshole," Del hissed.
"Whups, sorry," Kevin said.
Jamie rolled his eyes. "Way to go. Scare 'em all off."
"Well, shit. We ain't there yet anyway, are we?"
"That's not the point -"
"Couple more miles," Tim said quietly. "That way."
"Moron," Del said under his breath.
"I didn't hurt nuthin'. Right, Tim?"
"Not yet," Del said to Jamie, who grinned.
"That's why we're downwind," Tim mumbled, looking at the next rise.
"Uh-huh," Kevin added, all smug.
"Have another beer... dude," Jamie said, getting a chuckle out of Del.

They split up at the foot of a ridge. Tim was scouting, so it obvious that Kevin was too much of an oaf to go with him.
This didn't make Del too happy. "Just don't make so much fuckin' noise," he murmured. Kevin flipped him off, but to his back. Jamie looked at Tim and grinned. Away they went.

Tim crouched behind a tree, looking for deer-sign. He looked over at Jamie, just in time to see him step ahead - out of cover.
"Sssst!"
Jamie looked back. "What?"
"They don't cut across. Always around." Jamie shrugged. "Besides, they can see you -"
"You picking up anything?" he whispered, gesturing at the ground.
"Uh, no," Tim admitted, looking around. "I can't understand it. This place should be swarming with 'em."
"Best green bud you ever had," Jamie said, patting a pocket.
"Later. Try and keep a clear head. You shoot me, you're fired."
Jamie chuckled. "So now what?"
Tim stood up and stretched. "I'm going to circle around south, see if there's anything. Probably we have to go farther in... You'd best just hang tight, I'll only be a few minutes."
"Check."

Nada. He wasn't picking up anything, other than the birds. There was a stream farther off, but no scraped bark, no prints...
He got back to the clearing - but found no sign of Jamie. Something caught his eye, though - a patch of grass about thirty yards from the trees. There were boot-prints in the snow leading to it.
Tim looked around again and walked over -
The ground dropped out from under his feet.

Fortunately (or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it) his hat was knocked off. It lay upside down on the grass, right next to the trap door - which was undetectable, camouflaged in its own way. And waiting.

Del got angrier as he covered more ground. He and Kevin had waited at the north foot of the ridge, but the others never showed. They crept a little further east, as far as the creek. Flushed a small doe, but if there were other deer they didn't see 'em.
At first Kevin tried joking around, but Del was in no mood for it. It was already too late in the morning... So he fired up a cigar, which insured any deer with a brain would stay miles away from 'em. Kevin got his cigarettes out, very relieved.
Del's mood tanked as watched the light grow. What was up with Tim?
"Maybe Jamie busted a leg or something?" Kevin said timidly.
"Oh yeah? You think one of 'em maybe woulda yelled for some help?," Del shot back. "Fuck. Biggest fuckin' dipshit mutherfucker in town, and I get stuck with you," he barked, stalking off.
They got back to the place where they'd last seen Tim and Jamie. There was no sign they'd come back.
"Aw hell," Del said. He got out another cigar, and headed in the direction the other guys had gone. He didn't look back at Kevin once. He wasn't real sure he could find his was back to the cabin - seriously hung over when they started out - and Kevin was worse than useless.

At the clearing...
"Hey," Kevin said. Del ignored him. "Look."
Grimly, he turned, and saw Kevin pointing toward the grassy patch. "What?"
"What is that thing?"
He squinted. "Rock."
"Naaaah. A hat, maybe. Is that Tim's?"
Del scowled. "Maybe." He looked around, puffed on his cigar... After a minute, he shook his head. "Something ain't right," he said to himself. He put two fingers between his lips and whistled.
"Whoa," Kevin muttered, after he jumped. "Loud."
Two more loud whistles - and nothing. "Huh," Del said at last.
"You think the hat is a sign? Like he left it there on purpose?"
"No. He wouldn't leave it like that. Stick a tree branch in the snow, put it on top - maybe."
"I'll go get it."
"No you won't," Del snapped. "Stay here. Right here. I wanna look around."
Kevin shrugged. "Gotta take a leak anyway." He wandered off. Ignoring Del's order to stay put.
Warily, Del headed out into the clearing.

"Oh, great," Kevin whined.
He ditched me. And I'm never gonna find the cabin... He listened hard. Nothing.
With a big sigh, he took a last look around. The hat was still there. He walked toward it. Footprints... Somebody had been there, alright.
Studying it, Kevin cocked his head. He lurched east a little, and approached the hat from the opposite side.
He reached down and picked up the hat, looked at it, turned it over. Took two steps, and fell -
On top of somebody. What the fuck.

Darkness, and warmth.
The smells - clay, something metallic, and... something like fresh-baked bread.
Then Kevin got tired, all of a sudden.
* Looky here. Visitors. Got me a whole mess of hunters. Younger... *
The voice was faint, and he couldn't place where it came from. Old guy. But maybe a speaker was shorting out or something, 'cause there was something odd about the way he sounded.
* No stragglers. The whole kit and kaboodle penned up, sweet as you please... *
But he was too sleepy to think about it anymore.

 
- - 3 - -
 

Jamie's arm moved, but he wasn't aware of it.
Then his other arm. Over his head. He started to slide east. Through the wall, which was only a projected image of a wall. As he progressed down a passageway, his ankles began to rise. He didn't wake up at all...
Through an opening and into a small chamber. Over to a big grey ovoid, bulging with scanners.
Ninety-seven tests were conducted.

He was carried out of the chamber forty minutes later, naked, still asleep. Thirty spots on his head and neck, each about the size of a pea, had been shaved. Thin microtransceivers had been installed under his skin...
Around a curving hallway and into a larger room -
In the center, a bed materialized. Far too high. Thick oak posts. As Jamie was brought closer, a bearskin rug appeared on top of the sheets.
Right before he was set down on it, the rug was replaced... with a great imitation of mink.

Tim was picked up next and taken to the ovoid.

When all four guys had been prepped, they were laid out, two in each chamber, on big mink-covered beds.
A dark bundle appeared, floated over Jamie, and came apart. One of his hiking boots fell on his gut, but he hardly stirred.
Invisible hands dressed him, except for his coat.

Analysis of the data continued for another nine minutes.
Then another bundle came to Kevin... and he was clothed. A hard pack of cigarettes floated out of his coat and slipped into his t-shirt pocket. His coat disappeared.
Del was brought in, and laid alongside Kevin.
The entry was sealed with a thick panel of metal alloy.

Tim was moved to Jamie's bed - and the opening to their room was closed off as well. Empty beds disappeared.
 

Rather suddenly, Kevin and Jamie woke up. Yawning, stretching. Sitting up without really opening their eyes.

Kevin dug for a cigarette and lit it mechanically...

Jamie looked over - and saw Tim. Naked. In the same bed -
"What. The hell. Is this?" Jamie said.
* What do you want it to be? * an older man's voice shot back.
Jamie jumped to his feet and looked around. Soft light, grey metal walls, curved, no right angles anywhere. Tim snored quietly. Looked like fur, under him.
"Gotta be a bad dream," Jamie said to himself, looking for a door.
* Well, I fear you're wrong on that count, sir. You're wide awake. *
Jamie froze. Where am I? he thought. Did I hear that, or not -
* In your head. We can talk like this, and you don't have to say anything out loud. Go on, try it. *
* What kind of sick joke is this? *
* Hmmmm. I reckon you mean "not normal". That's rightly so. But it's no joke. Not at all. This is no laughing matter for me... But it will be for Tim. Yessir. You'll give him something to laugh about. *
Jamie felt a stab of fear. Confusion. And then, he looked down at his boss, sleeping there... and slowly started to grin. Didn't know why, exactly. He just knew he had a hell of a lot of choices, here, but nothing specific was coming to mind. It would be a rush to "what-if". For example, I could -
Give him something to laugh about...?
* That's one bodacious expression on your face, there, Jamie. *
He chuckled out loud.
 

* I must be drunk, really drunk, that's it - *
* C'mon, Kevin. Honestly. *
* It makes more sense than what you're telling me. * Kevin tugged hard on his cigarette, and his hand shook.
* Look at Del's head. Behind his ears. And high up on his neck, there. See those little bald spots? *
* Y-yeah. *
* Now kindly touch the same areas on your own head. *
Kevin did. * What the hell did you do to us? *
 

* Where - exactly where - are we? * Jamie said.
The old guy's voice paused. * How would you like me to measure it? *
* No. I mean, we were hunting, and now we're in here - hey, are Del and Kevin here too? *
* In the next room, safe and sound. You're all under the surface of the earth. *
Jamie blinked. * Yeah. Sure. How far under? *
* Do you have a... ruler? *
* Roughly. Approximately. *
* Eighteen feet. *
* Oh, * Jamie thought, relieved.
* Just beneath a... "clearing". *
* Yeah. I remember. So the other guys fell down here too? *
* They surely did. *
* Lemme see 'em - *
* All in good time, Jamie. *
 

One more time, Kevin looked around for a way out of there. Then he sighed and sat down on the edge of the bed.
* You got no right to be shoving shit into us like that. Radios. Damn. *
* I understand you don't like the notion, and I am truly sorry it discomfits you so. But there's an powerful good reason... and you may be sure you four gentlemen will profit. In every way. *
Well, he did like the sound of that last part. * What's so important that you just experiment on people without their permission? Who are you, really? CIA? *
There was a pause. * Oh, land a-mighty, no. Not guv'mint. As for permission, I reckon you'll understand that part soon enough. *
 

* What kind of information? * Jamie asked, curious despite himself.
* About you. The way you think. How you're different from each other. *
* So you're... what, a space alien? *
* Well, I suppose so. *
Jamie stopped smiling. "That was a joke," he said out loud.
* Ah. And a fine one, at that. *
 

Kevin paused, with his Zippo burning an inch from his next smoke. * Get the fuck outa here. *
* A statement of disbelief, I take it. *
* This is a UFO. We're in a UFO? *
The voice eventually chuckled. * Well, I'd hardly say it's unidentified. I know it quite well. *
* So why do you sound like a old guy? I mean, human? *
* There was a man, once. Made his acquaintance... he wandered over the grass, above me, just as you did. Well, he was ailing. I tried to rejuvenate him, but he just plumb wore out. *
 

* When did this happen? How long ago? * Jamie said.
* How would you like me to measure it? *
* That again, huh. Did the guy say what year it was? *
* He wasn't particularly sure. His best guess was 1868. *
Well, I didn't hear that, Jamie thought. * You mean 1968? *
* No, he said 1868. *
* This is too much. You must have your numbers wrong. * He looked down at Tim. * You should be talking to him. He's the smart one. *
* Shall I wake him? *
* Yeah... *
Tim yawned, and grunted.
* C'mon, dude, wake up. *
* Okay, okay already. *
Tim looked around quickly. Their eyes locked.
"Long story," Jamie said quietly. Then he looked up toward the ceiling. "How 'bout bringing him up to date? All the stuff you told me?"
* Will do. *
Tim flinched. His eyes opened wide.
* Holy shit, * he thought -
* Now that may be the oddest set of cusswords I ever did hear, * the voice told them.

* So you're getting this, right, Tim? * Jamie thought.
"Yeah," Tim said, all dazed. * I'm getting the picture. You? *
* Uh huh. *
* So, uh... old man, do you have a name...? *
* Oh. He called himself Black River Zeke. Ezekiel George Haverson. But you boys can just call me... Zeke. *
* I don't get the difference between "he" and "me" yet, * Tim thought to Jamie. Then, to Zeke: * Well, you know about us. We're at a definite disadvantage. Are you sure he said 1868? *
* Yessir. *
Tim sat up and thought for a second. * Do you have a count of the number of planetary rotations since "he" died? And since you, uh, arrived on our planet? *
A warm rush of endorphins hit them both. * Now we're getting somewhere! Capital suggestion, Tim. 48,698 sunrises and sunsets. *
Jamie sat down suddenly, and let out a big, happy moan. * Fuck. Oh yeah. * Then he happily babbled the same thing out loud.
* C'mon, dammit, stay sharp, * Tim thought at him.
* Fuck you, * Jamie shot back. Tim had copped a 'tude again, big boss-man, and it made him sorta mad. Or something. He needed to think that over -
* What is a "tude"? * Zeke asked, with an eager quickness.
* Tell ya later, * Jamie said. He looked toward Tim and shook his head a little.
* Oh. To be sure, * Zeke replied - privately, as it turned out. His boss was still trying to do some math. So a private thought-conversation with Zeke was possible, huh...?
Tim shook his head. * I can't - alright, Zeke, can you divide that number you just said by 365 - uh, make that 365.25 - *
* 133.328542- *
* Good, that's good enough. Subtract it from two thousand point... eight... three. *
* 1867.51 - er, precise enough ? *
Tim looked at Jamie. * Damn. 1867. Summer... no, maybe not. His number might be exact, but mine isn't. *
Jamie nodded. * Whoa. So, Zeke ol' buddy, if a year is 365 - and a quarter - rotations... about how many years ago did this spaceship arrive here? *
* Six hundred and seventy-three. *
 

* You sure he's okay? * Kevin said, looking at Del.
* Never better, * Zeke reassured him. * Do you want him to wake up now? *
* No, actually. But he can... anytime. Is that it? *
* That's right. *
Kevin took a drag. The longer Del slept, the less he'd be yelling -
Zeke got real interested. * He's a mean cuss... is that it? *
* Oh, you got no idea, * Kevin said, sighing out smoke as he did.
* Ornery? *
* Yeah... So, anyway. The real Zeke died in here, and... the ship, the computers, studied him? That voice is, uh... *
Zeke hopped into Tim's brain, without being noticed, and shuffled through his vocabulary. * Synthesized. *
* Yeah, that's the word. *
* That's correct. *
* Black River Zeke was an actual person, and you learned how to, uh, get inside our heads... from reading his mind. *
* Well, that's as good an explanation as any, * Zeke chuckled kindly.
* I'm having a conversation with a ship right now. The machines on a spaceship. Supposedly - *
* I think you've got it. *
* Huh. * Kevin looked around. * Unless you just wanna confuse us, you've gotta - hey, I know. When you're talking about Zeke the human, use "he". All the rest of the time, use "I" - or "it". *
After a couple seconds, an endorphin-blitz hit him like a fire hose.
 

* ...so you can always refer to me as "it". *
Tim shook his head. * Okay. We don't have much experience with talking machines. Computers that are sentient hav- *
* Yes... I must say, it's a real pleasure hobnobbing with you, Tim. *
Jamie snorted.
* It's a pity, really... that you're running out of the really pressing questions. *
Tim just shrugged.
He doesn't get it, Jamie realized, with growing happiness. But I do. He's not the boss, in here. I'll show him. He'll get it, alright. Real soon now. Hell yeah. Is he ever gonna get it.
 

* Why all this? * Kevin said, peeling open his last pack. * Why us? We just came out here to hunt. *
* I guess you could say I'm a hunter, too. A seeker of knowledge. *
* You already got to study Zeke - I mean, that guy... *
And back into Tim's head, for a long second, to build a personalized analogy. * If you got a... pallet of car batteries from a new supplier, and the first one was up to your standards - would you assume that all the batteries on the pallet were just as good? *
* Shit, no. *
* Why not? *
* There's always some lemons. *
Another pause. * Oh. I see. But aren't they all supposed to be identical? *
" Well, yeah... * He took a long drag. * But it doesn't work out like that - *
* So there could be differences, on the inside... of the batteries? *
* I guess - oh. I get it. *
* Good. *

* What exactly are you gonna do to us? * Jamie thought, staring at Tim while he did.
* Why, I'm going to make you... very wealthy men. *
 

* It's really quite simple, Kevin. I was built to look for interesting planets. I detected yours, came down a long time ago, and analyzed the dirt and the grass... *
* Uh huh. *
* Oh, the occasional deer or hawk, some rabbits... And Black River Zeke came along. Obviously my knowledge would have been sorely lacking, if I'd never found out about humans! *
* Yeah. So - *
* So, * Zeke said triumphantly, * here you are. *

 
- - 4 - -
 

"I don't like this," Tim said out loud.
Jamie made a face at him. Too bad, he thought to himself. I do believe I'm gonna like this a lot.
* I must have data, Tim, * Zeke said, a little too innocently. * Surely you can appreciate that. Ah, to borrow a phrase from you... what good is "a sample of one" ? *
* There are researchers who would fall all over themselves to cooperate - *
Zeke made a tut-tut "noise". * For me to become... widely known to your species is risky, in several bothersome ways. Isn't it? *
* I suppose. *
* Suppose, nothing. You knew that before you suggested it. You're a smooth talker, aren't you, Tim? * Zeke's "tone" changed. Not angry... but definitely negative, somehow.
* Hey, now, uh... Can't blame a guy for trying. *
Jamie snorted again. He didn't know why, but he really liked seeing Tim squirm.
 

* 'struth, I do have another reason for revealing myself to you. *
Oh boy, here it comes, Kevin thought.
* No, no, * Zeke said smoothly. * There's no need for alarm, son. Why, I wouldn't harm a hair on your h- well, goodness sakes, I suppose it's too late to say that. Shut my mouth. *
* I think we'd better be going, * Kevin said uncertainly.
* Oh, you will. *
* Now. * Then, after an uncomfortable pause, * Please. *
Zeke went fishing in Tim's head again. Retrieved something, and cross-checked it with Jamie. * Sunday. *
* Right now - *
* No, not until Sunday. And that's that. You were planning to hunt until Sunday morning, weren't you? I'll even throw in a nice big buck or two. *
* This is fucked up. Let me talk to Tim, see what he says. *
* Right now he's indisposed. *
* What? *
* Sorry. He's... "all tied up" - is that really a cliché you use? Extraordinary! *
Kevin shot an involuntary look at the headboard. Six inches thick, easy. Then at Del, lying there... helpless.
* Jamie, then. *
* He's "got his hands full". * And Zeke laughed.
Kevin didn't know what was so funny, and he didn't care. * Quit playing word games. Dammit. You let us go, now, and we can figure out how to get all kinds of people to come up here, scientists n' shit - *
* But I've got you guys, * Zeke sighed. * You're already here. I've waited centuries for an opportunity like this. So I have until Saturday night to persuade you - three li'l old days - to help me. *
* Help you... how? *
 

Tim was on the alert. * Wait just a minute here - *
* Always have to be in charge. Am I right, Tim? Pushing other people around? * Zeke said dryly.
* Uh-huh, * Jamie replied, eyes narrowing again.
Tim stared at him. Why is he... * Jamie! I got it -* Then, out loud, "Jamie. It's some kind of divide and conquer thing. He - it's trying to pit us against each other."
Jamie thought about it. His head cleared a little. He nodded, understanding what Tim was saying... but he really didn't want to let go of the mood.
* He's a clever bastard, * Zeke whispered. * Needs a good licking. *
Jamie's adrenaline surged. Fuckin' A, he thought. And right then he decided to just go with it. Fuck it, Tim needed to be taken down a peg. A whole lot of pegs -
Wouldn't that be fun.
But he kept a poker face. "Why?" he said, trying to look confused.
"It's playing with us."
Zeke cackled. They both jumped a little.
"Well," Jamie finally managed to say, "maybe... that's just how it collects the data?"
Tim stared at him. Making excuses for it, just about. The balance of power had obviously shifted.
And before he could stop himself, Tim gulped.
 

* Egg on my face - well, if I had a face. That's a joke, Kevin. Well, you see, when I landed here, some big ol' trees broke my fall. But I flattened 'em, and fell the rest of the way... Right on a big ol' rock. And, well, some of my systems aren't in tip-top condition. *
Kevin felt mildly sorry for the ship. * What systems? *
* Oh, some features I haven't even missed... Input moderation, target-empathy, impact minimization, volition tolerance. Beneficence-overrides. *
Kevin just blinked.
* Most important, though, is propulsion. I can't overcome your gravity, Kevin, damaged as I am. From what I see in your heads, the best time to pick myself up and present myself to a... university would have been a couple hundred years ago. Not so easy, today. *
* So you want us to move you? * Kevin thought. Oh yeah, sure -
* Oh, not all of me. Just the best parts. *
* How m- *
* Please don't trouble yourself, Kevin. I'll work it all out. What I mostly needed was some muscle... * and Zeke's "tone" changed, * such as we have here. * Del's head came up a little, just like somebody had grabbed a-hold of his hair. Then it dropped. He smacked his lips once, but didn't wake up.
Kevin smiled. He got a huge rush, for some reason...
* Hey. Do that again. *
* What... this? * And Del's sleeping head raised back up.
"Yeah," Kevin whispered.
 

Gotta do something. Now. Show it up, get through to Jamie...
"Zeke!" Tim yelled. Then, * What data? Specifically? What do you want to learn from us... here and now? *
* Why, Tim, that's simple, * Zeke said, too politely. * You're an ingenious collection of chemicals. Every thought and memory and reaction can be expressed as a... mathematical formula. *
* In theory. *
* No, Tim. Theory in your world... Fact, in mine. Darn easy to find, and measure, and repeat - and manipulate. *
* So you say - *
Zeke laughed. * You'll see. You'll all be believers by Saturday. Darn tootin'. Some experiments go quick, obviously enough. And some take longer. See if you still get the expected results after a few hours... or a couple days... *
Jamie felt a rush of excitement fly through his veins.
* I run across something particularly potent, I naturally set out to investigate it, * Zeke continued amiably. * Take Black River Zeke, for example. He had some memories, let me tell you. One he liked so much, he thought about a lot. Every day. It was perfect, as far as he was concerned. *
They waited. Jamie watched his boss slyly, wanting him to prompt Zeke to continue.
* And? * Tim finally snapped.
Ooooo, he's so full of himself, Jamie thought.
* Well, it took place when he was a wild and wooly man of twenty... and she was a sporting lady, a little slip of a thing. Just eighteen. *
Jamie licked his lips.

* He persuaded her to come out to his cabin for a visit, * Zeke went on. * They had their fun. And as they did, he found out... something about her. Something that he'd always wanted to try... and there she was, his golden opportunity. Asleep on his bearskin rug. *
* So he picked up some reins, and stretched her out gently... piled logs on the far ends - *
"Don't," Tim said earnestly. "Jamie, we don't need to listen to this -"
* What'd he do then, Zeke? * Jamie thought back, smugly and deliberately.
* Why, I'll tell you what he did, boys. * Another nostalgic chuckle. * He tickled her. All over her body. Front side, and back side, and right down to her toes. He took feathers to her, and bear grease, and corn straws... whatever he could think of. And he fed her and let her rest up - and then he started in on her again. * A light bulb went on for Jamie. Well, of course! Shit. He grinned harder -
* Oh no, no, no... * Tim thought, paralyzed with fear.

* Yep. He tickled that whore for three days and three nights. * Zeke chuckled one more time. * Kept her up, he did. Not just a little play-acting. Oh no. He worked hard at it, 'til he couldn't keep his eyes open. What a time he had. So you can understand why he'd mull that over in his mind, over and over. And, I trust, you can see why it would be such a compelling experience - er, memory - for me to study. *
And Zeke whispered to Jamie, * Data. Powerful... exertion. Intense. Can you help me get it, friend? *
* Oh. Yeah. * Jamie laughed. He felt... real mean.
 

* What's the matter, Kevin? *
He almost blushed. * Just, ah, he's usually a real jerk. To me. *
* Do tell. * Zeke let the pause grow. * You really think he slept with Shawna? While she was still your wife? *
Rage and revenge took hold of him...
And he decided to let 'em boil over.
 

* Well, boys, that's enough jabbering. I'll just leave you be for awhile. *
Whew, Tim thought.
* Okay, hoss, * Zeke said to Jamie. * He thinks I'm leaving - but I wouldn't miss this for the world. Now anything you can do, that doesn't... cause injury - why, I'll do my level best to help, * it snickered.
"Fuck yeah," he said softly. Tim looked at him - and damn, but didn't he look weird. What is that?
Then Jamie figured it out. Fear. He's afraid.
As well he should be -
* I'll be monitoring you. Anything you need - anything at all - why, you just think about it. *
Suddenly, Tim flinched. Zeke had quit... transmitting to him.
But to Jamie... * Tickling that whore. Tickling her hard - why, I can only imagine how it must've made him feel - *
* You got... rope? *
Zeke sighed happily. * Anything you want. I am in your debt, good sir. Data of this stripe... I've been waiting since 1867 to get my hands on it. *
* I'm your man. *
* Yes, indeed. That you are. * Zeke whispered even more conspiratorially. * And I'm here to assist. Tim's all yours. You've never had an opportunity like this, Jamie. Seize it! *
 

* I'll - kill him! Where's my knife - *
* No, no, Kevin. That's too good for the likes of him. *
After a second, Kevin nodded, relaxing somewhat. He dug for a new smoke.
* Too quick. You want to make him pay. *
* Yeah, * Kevin said.
* A lingering punishment - *
* I know. Let him starve to death. *
Zeke made a thoughtful sound. * Well, we could... though I was hoping to gather some new data, from whatever punishment we come up with. Some wild, discombobulated reactions, that's the data I lack... And when Black River Zeke expired - let's just say I have enough of that kind of, uh, final data already. *
Kevin sighed. * I really wanna kill him. *
* When you can fix him up for a long, tortuous punishment? And you can always kill him later. *
* Well. Okay... *
* What could you do to him, say... until Saturday... that would hold his attention. I mean, really hold his attention, Kevin! *
* Cut him? * Kevin replied eagerly, looking at Del's crotch.
* Will he be completely excited? A severe enough trial, for the entire three days? That's the sort of data I couldn't get from the man Zeke... *
Kevin thought it over. * No, * he thought glumly.
* Ah. All right, there must be some torture we can concoct for him. Fierce... perhaps not actually injuring him, so the sentence can be carried out for the entire three days, Saturday being just as unbearable as tonight... *
After smoking some more, Kevin shrugged. * You got me. *

* Oh, now. Think. Is there anything, perhaps, that you've suffered through - *
* Root canal, * Kevin shot back.
Zeke looked in Kevin's head for the memory, and sighed. * No. Something that won't truly damage him? It would be a darn shame if he passed out before we were done. Or got used to the torment, somehow. Do you see what I mean? * That got an uncertain nod. * Grueling, not damaging, surely embarrassing. Think, Kevin. Any ideas? Bad... memories? *
There it was - he finally remembered. Zeke waited...
* Well. Nnnnaw, not really. * Kevin thought.
* What? Any idea will do, for starters. *
* It's too stupid. *
Zeke waited a beat. * Well, sometimes those... simple things are the most maddening. *
Kevin looked at Del again... and a crafty look came over his face. * We could... tickle him. *
* Tickle... Hmmmmm. * A long pause. * Such as... what your brothers did - *
* Don't. *
* In the treehouse? *
Kevin shivered. "Stop. C'mon," he whined. "It was a stupid idea."
* But... you really hated that, didn't you? *
* Oh, fuck. *
* For a big man, it could be more extreme. Amplified, I should say. Yet it doesn't have to damage the skin or the muscles. *
* Guess not. * Kevin looked at Del, lying there on his back. Wouldn't that just settle his hash. A stupid kiddy thing, turned up... all the way. Starting all over again, every time he woke up. Maybe it wasn't such a dumb idea -
Neutrally, Zeke asked, * Are... all men as tickly as you? All done in, if they get tickled? *

* Ticklish. Not tickly. * Kevin was distracted. He was picturing Del there... Hands cuffed to those fine posts. Ankles too. Roaring like a thunderstorm, and not going anywhere. Howling. * Uh, no. It varies. *
* You wouldn't happen to know... if Del is... ticklish. Would you? *
Kevin swallowed hard. * No idea. *
Zeke said nothing for a while. Kevin's imagination filled in more electrifying details.
* Would you care to find out? *

On to Part 2

05sep2001