Hummer smelled weed as soon as he opened the door of his room.
He frowned. Nine in the morning. Fuck.
He lurched into the bathroom and took a leak. Coming down the hall, he stepped on something black. Leather, and chrome -
It was slightly sticky.
"Dammit," he said to no one in particular, throwing it at Doug's closed door.
A pack of cigarettes waited on the kitchen table.
It was the brand he smoked all through high school. They were like old buddies. Every time that brand showed up here - instead of the usual - it meant she wasn't gonna take no for an answer, even though he was determined not to get hooked on 'em again...
Hummer made coffee, and while it brewed he squashed the pack flat - slowly and thoroughly. When they still weren't destroyed enough to suit him, he looked around for something heavy. A frying pan was the best he could come up with, so he leaned on it and flattened the pack even more. He left it there.
Sipping coffee, in his easy chair, Hummer sorta wished he'd taken one cigarette out before he wrecked the rest. It would go with the coffee - but that's how it always started, wasn't it? One won't hurt. And then he was hooked again.
Xhi knew that.
It would've been a hell of a lot easier to quit if she wasn't around. Just put 'em down for good. But no, she wanted him to smoke. Never letting up. Sticking 'em between his fingers, already lit. If he resisted long enough, she'd just pull gloves on his hands and park him in his chair, make him chain-smoke a couple packs...
Stuff like that usually happened when Doug was asleep. Xhi never rested, apparently.
"Witch," he said, substituting a letter in his head. He knew better than to say it out loud. Ever. She'd followed him everywhere. She didn't like that word, so he wasn't allowed to use it. Even if he was drunk... He remembered that campaign - punishing him, and Doug, whenever they slipped. The shiny black paddle. After about a month, they learned. But they still thought it. She couldn't stop 'em from doing that.
They really needed a stronger term to describe Xhi.
"Fuckin' slavemaster," Hummer said, glancing back at Doug's door. He sighed again and picked up the TV remote, wondering if maybe there was another pack of smokes somewhere...
He was watching a NASCAR race and draining his coffee when he heard a jingling sound behind him.
When he looked, he saw Doug standing there - breathing hard, arms up over his head, wrists handcuffed together. He was wearing black rubber shorts and a studded collar. Sweat was shining on the tats that covered him...
Two black rubber gloves were poised to attack his armpits.
Hummer rolled his eyes.
"Uh..." Doug said weakly. "Smoke, or the jock gets it."
"C'mon -"
A new pack of cigarettes landed on Hummer's belly. He looked at them, and scowled at Doug.
His roommate's eyes were big. Stoned, yeah. But the message was still there. Do it. Now. She's not kidding.
The fingers moved a little closer to his skin. Xhi meant business...
Hummer peeled open the pack, and stuck a cigarette between his lips.
An ashtray drifted over from the coffee table. There was a book of matches in it. Hummer got busy...
"There," he said finally.
Doug's arms jerked, and he lowered them slowly. He didn't take his eyes off the glove by his left side - not until it backed away.
"Whew," he hissed. "Thanks."
"Like it even matters," Hummer grumbled. "You're gonna get it either way."
Doug groaned, and limped over to the couch. When he lowered himself down, his face was all twisted. Real sore. She rode him hard.
"You need anything?"
He shook his head after a second, loosening up. Wobbly. At least he still had a buzz goin'. Looked good. Hummer thought it over. Xhi usually jumped at the chance to get him loaded... No. There was always a price to be paid, whenever he asked her for something. Huge fuckin' price tag.
The carafe from the coffeemaker floated into the room. A mug followed it. Doug put his hands up and took the mug.
"Can I please have a smoke?" he growled. After a second or two, he just sighed.
"Twisted witch," Hummer said.
"Tellin' me."
The carafe came over Hummer and hung there. He picked up his own mug and let it give him a refill.
"Got some news," Doug said, like it wasn't good news.
"Terrific," Hummer shot back, burning another cig. "Okay. I'm ready for it."
"Vacation."
"Me?" but Hummer knew better than that.
"Uh... no."
"Shit." Xhi let Doug take a trip every few months. If she didn't haul in some temporary plaything, she'd just be hanging around... and Hummer would be in danger whenever he stuck his head in the house. He had no fuckin' idea how Doug put up with it.
"I'll find a housesitter," Hummer joked.
Doug grinned at that. "I wish... She says she's already got somebody in her sights."
"Me, probably."
After cocking his head for a few seconds, Doug just shrugged.
Swell, Hummer thought to himself. She's gonna keep me in suspense.
Pans started banging in the kitchen. The whisk could be heard racing around a steel bowl. Neither guy moved. Going into the kitchen when Xhi was cooking was never smart.
Omelets came to them... just the way they liked 'em. Limp bacon for Hummer, and Doug's was burned to a crisp. They ate silently, watching the TV.
The phone rang, and they looked at each other. "You," Doug said - as in, you go get it. So Hummer got his ass up and answered the phone.
It was Jeanine, Doug's ex-wife. As he said hi, Hummer looked over again. Doug closed his eyes, and finally nodded... so it was okay with Xhi for him to get the phone. Hummer started to lob it over, and saw the handcuffs. So he took Doug's plate away and handed him the phone.
The conversation was quiet. Nothing unusual. Maybe fifteen minutes long... Doug didn't say anything about Xhi because he'd already told Jeanine, several times. He'd told everybody. So had Hummer. It didn't matter.
Nobody believed them.
Doug had told his mom and his sisters, over and over. They refused to treat it as anything more than a joke. Never mind the tats, the lack of body hair - hell, neither guy had been allowed to work since last year. But they had plenty of money. Doug stayed home all the time, just about. Not even the cops took Xhi seriously. Apparently she could hypnotize anybody she wanted.
The guys were caught good, and their "houseguest" didn't seem like she was ever gonna leave.
Hummer had himself another smoke. Doug hung up the phone...
"Car?"
"Huh? No," Doug said. "Her car's okay. She's seeing a new guy."
"But you two will always be friends." They both laughed. "I hate that shit."
Doug nodded. "Gimme a cigarette."
"Doug."
"Do it."
"You'll be sorry," Hummer predicted, but he shook one out of the pack.
"I'm already sorry," Doug said as he caught it. "One sorry son of a... witch."
Hummer nodded, and tossed the matchbook over.
"Oh yeah." Leaning back, Doug exhaled smoke and closed his eyes. "It's worth it."
Hummer wasn't so sure. "Like you need to get her riled up?"
"Hey. A guy oughta be able to have a fuckin' cigarette in his own fuckin' house."
"When you talk like that, I wonder about you."
"Why?"
Hummer got himself another cigarette, and gestured for the matches. "Either she's makin' you say that, act all rebellious 'n shit - or you're dumber than you look."
There must have been something in the coffee. Hummer's cup, at least... Doug was looking over at him, and he had a weird expression on his face. Gotta remember to ask him about that later, Hummer thought. But the drug was kicking in fast.
The bitch drugged me again.
At least she's not there. No Xhi there. Wonderful...
Then, the safety of darkness.
Overcast sky.
Hummer watched clouds for awhile through the little spaces in the miniblinds.
His hands were cuffed way over his head. Ankles spread out, too. He couldn't move.
The window had a big metal box over it. Just like in Doug's room.
Doug's old room.
He talked himself down from the panic. At the moment he was comfortable. Xhi wasn't there.
But eventually, the door opened.
And closed.
He tried to brace himself for the impossible -
Did you have a nice nap? she teased.
"Uh-huh," he said, looking around.
No. Don't answer out loud. I can read your mind... sweetcakes.
One word, he thought. Rhymes with witch.
Gentle laughter.
Where's Doug?
You already know.
And he did. Gone. Free... Now, you really did let him go, right?
Yes. He was fun. But that's all over now.
For him...
A long, contented sigh.
The miniblinds flattened out. Metal started rattling - the window shutter. Like a smaller version of a loading bay door. Invisible, from outside the house. Depressingly secure. And the lamp on the bedside table clicked on -
The drawer slid open. An ashtray, a lighter, two packs of cigarettes. Hummer's old brand.
Cigarette?
No thanks.
She laughed harder. Oh, Hummer. You know better -
Smoke. Just like that.
All of a sudden he was taking a long drag. There was a thick haze in the room. Hummer's throat felt as if he'd smoked a few cigarettes.
The big mirror on the ceiling was uncovered. All he was wearing was black rubber shorts... and a studded collar.
How'd she do that, he thought to himself -
I'm going to seriously enjoy this. Making you toe the line.
Xhi...
I bet you're ready for some water.
Yes. Nothing happened. Please?
Very good.
She waited until he took one more drag. He kicked the smoke out as he watched the cigarette float to the ashtray and snuff itself. Suicide butt.
I couldn't resist it any longer. You're just too tempting.
Uh-oh, he thought - and realized he had to stop imagining what she was tempted to do to him. Would do. How can I stop thinking, he wondered?
A water bottle came to him. Drink up.
And he did.
Better?
Yeah.
A bandanna floated up in the air. Snapped out, dramatically.
"Don't," he said, trying to back up. It dove at his head.
See? she taunted, tying the gag. You can't help but talk. But I've put a stop to that.
"Ccuuuhhmmaaaaah," he wailed.
I won't have you scaring Leon. Not before I've worked on him for awhile.
That stopped him in his tracks. Uh... Leon? he thought uncertainly.
Uh-huh. She giggled. Doug had you - and you have Leon.
And Xhi, of course, has both Hummer and Leon.
My new toy is so smart!
Hummer sighed.
Okay. Think. Maybe she won't put him through the kind of paces that Doug... No good. Okay. Maybe she'll get tired of this. That was even less likely. Maybe Doug, or his mom, or Hummer's own brothers would finally come around. But that never happened. She had an invisible shield around the house, something like that. He and Doug had never figured that one out...
Doug's forgotten the address. Right?
So smart. And he thinks you moved, too. Moved out. And wouldn't you know it, he lost your new address... but you parted on good terms.
That's nice, Xhi. Uh... This Leon character - would he be tied to a chair right now?
Strapped to your bed. I mean, his bed. Do you like this mattress? Is it firm enough for your back?
I'll let you know, he thought vacantly.
Well, you better.
So... Leon's not gonna be escaping, is he?
Not before you do.
He looked at the steel plates covering the window -
The closet opened.
A box floated over to the bed. Rubber gloves.
"Neeeeeeeeeeeff," he wailed, squirming.
Leon will need a few days to understand his place. Just like you did, remember? I'll give him a good ten hours alone. Blindfolded, gagged. He'll get thirsty, won't he? And when I give him some water, he'll be relieved... despite himself. Seven or eight hours of white-hot tickling will be all the more disorienting for the poor helpless guy -
You've got it all worked out, he thought.
Poor little shut-in...
A glass decanter cruised off the closet shelf.
I just wanna shower you with attention.
Hummer pulled at the straps. The stopper flew out of the decanter with a moist pop.
When your voice is gone, you can smoke. A lot. I just love watching you smoke.
How are you gonna get rid of my voice? Huh? But that was just the hysteria talking. He already knew.
You're so funny, Xhi "said" proudly.
The decanter poured oil all over him. Faint snapping noises, from somewhere by his legs, could only mean one thing -
I'm gonna let you entertain me for the next few days.
And when I'm asleep, Leon gets it?
Gloves were rising, filling up. Moving their fingers slowly. Almost... thoughtfully.
We have a winner. The grand prize... goes to Hummer.
He shook his head, but the gloves sauntered down anyway.
03aug2003